One month to live. Not a lot of time to do all I want to do, so I need to really hone in on the most important.

No, I am not really dying. Well, yes I am really dying. We all are. But I don't know when or if it will be this month. I am going through the book of the same title (One Month to Live)and hoping this will help me to evaluate how and what I spend my time on, and how and what I want to spend my time on.

Thus far, what I realize is that the most important area of change for me needs to be in relationships. I do not want to leave my husband having him think I regret marrying him (and since I've said this before, I have a lot to make up for). I do not want to leave with my husband and my son's relationship what it is today. I want to empower them to develop their own, without me meddling and taking over and making them believe they can do nothing without me. I want to spend every minute I can telling my son that he can do all things through Christ. I want him to know and accept that life is hard, weenies will not survive (not that he is one, just that he should never be one). I want him to know that his gifts are precious, and encourage him to use them. I want to prepare him for life without me.

I want my sisters to know that they have been my source of comfort, encouragement, and good stories. I want them to know that the hardest I have ever laughed has always been with them. I want them to know that they, too, can do all things through Christ. I want to ensure that I will be hanging out with them in Heaven.

I want my friends and those I work with to know that they have been special to me. They deserved a more faithful friend and co-worker, and that I am sorry. I want them to know that though I have failed them, Christ will never fail them. I want to tell them there is a hope and that hope changed my life and can change theirs.

I want to edit, add to, and publish my book. I want to leave it behind after I go because I want to share and minister to those who struggle. I want to help lead the readers to seeking God. And, quite frankly, I want proof that I existed.

I want to really encourage those who are fighting the good fight. I want to drink coffee with, talk on the phone with, email, or whatever is necessary with those who need encouragement, tools, and tips for fighting the battle. I want to use my gifts of encouragement, exhortation, and mercy to equip others to live their last days on earth fearlessly, excitedly, and with joy.

And I want to leave this earth with no more regrets.

That's it, but that's enough. I have to stop now, I've got much work to do and little time to do it in.

His work in progress,

Ellen